Is this a word you use to describe yourself?
This is the one word I took out of my vocabulary….forever
Tonight, I’m going to dinner to celebrate the birthday of my neighbor.
We will call him “Dave” although that’s not his real name.
Dave’s actual age is a bit shrouded in mystery…he holds onto this secret tightly. Or more accurately, he just simply doesn’t talk about it.
Through my sleuthing, I know Dave is around 82 or 83. (I believe it’s the latter)
If you met him, you would absolutely not believe he could possibly have an “8” in front of his age.
He presents very much like a man that is a full two decades younger. And, this is not just based on his physical appearance but how he shows up in the world. Full of energy, vitality and JOY. Dave is one of these people that has a truly magnetic personality.
He’s fit. He lifts weights (of course!), he hikes long distances and he puts himself through physical challenges. Lately, he likes to ask me how many pullups I can do…and he makes sure to let me know he can do more!
(I secretly love this!)
And, he’s a character…
He drives around in a red convertible sports car and dates women much younger (4 decades!) younger than himself.
He’s the unofficial Mayor of our town…EVERYONE knows Dave.
Once, my husband played golf with Dave at a tournament Martin Sheen was attending…and Martin marched right up to Dave and embraced him as an old friend. Of course.
And so, I started to wonder how does he do it??
How does he remain so vibrant when his peers in his age group are often anything but!
One day last year, I got my answer.
I walked by Dave’s house and he was lifting weights in his garage gym. This time, I walked in to talk to him and I saw a large piece of paper hung up on the wall.
In huge letters, the paper read:
“Don’t let the old man in”
The minute I saw this, I knew. This was his secret.
I asked him about it, and he explained that he doesn’t use the word “old”. He’s taken this word out of his vocabulary completely.
Because you see, the minute you start to think of yourself as old, you start to embody what it is to be old. We become the thing we tell ourselves.
And old, that’s not a word that is associated with living our best and fullest lives, is it?
“Old” is all about decline
Dave does not think of himself as old and as a result, he’s simply not
From that day on, I took the word old out of my vocabulary.
(No more of these type of conversations with myself…. ”I can’t find my keys, I must be getting old” Sound familiar?)
Age you see, it’s not only a physical state, it’s a mental state. The two go hand in hand.
Just as we work to improve our physical selves to become strong, we must work to improve our mindset. And, this includes being very intentional about the words we use when we talk to ourselves.
Because our subconscious mind is always listening.
And, it all MATTERS
So, am I aging?
YES! I embrace where I’m at in life and I can’t wait to see what the future holds.
Am I old?
Absolutely not!
It really is all a choice, my Midlife Sisters.
XO